I don’t post nudes or even tasteful partials because I’m not an exhibitionist. I could say that’s it – nothing deeper than that.
But it is deeper than that.
When I was in 6th grade I grew boobs. I went from zero to C in less than a year, and they kept growing. To say that I was, from that point on, sexualized by grown ass men should not shock you because it is so normalized in this culture. So from age 12 to age 41 when I had a reduction done I was a walking set of tits. They walked into rooms in front of me. The first compliments I would get from men were about them. I loathed them so much I wished I would get breast cancer, and I fantasized about carving them off my chest.
Now one could argue that getting boudoir photos or just posting nudes would be all about taking them back from the male gaze. But what happened when I had a (substantial) reduction done was that I could finally stop thinking about them. They were generally NOT the first thing men talked about with me. My smile became the #1 compliment. I wear an average bra size. I buy shirts without trauma. I can choose to show cleavage because I want to instead of showing it because it was never not there.
Also – unless I’m just limiting the views to other women, it is always going to be about the male gaze. Always. I have done so much work to decenter men from my existence – their opinions, their stories, their gaze, their desires… I’m not giving them freebee wank material any more.
So no, you will not see nudes, or otherwise stereotypical “hot chick” photos of me on Fet, or here. That is how I’ve taken back my sexual self – by denying access.