We had a packed Georgia Femme Dommes munch with an engaging discussion topic. We broke into groups, and each group selected a scene type—Mental, Medical, Bondage, Impact—then brainstormed what Negotiation, Assessment, and Safety (NAS) would look like for that type of scene.
There’s a lot of overlap regardless of the type of play, but each group presented fantastic details. It also served as a great social icebreaker.
For example, my group chose Bondage, and here’s what we came up with:
Negotiation
- What kind of bondage are we talking about? (Rope? Leather? Tape? Saran Wrap?)
- How long are we talking?
- Why does the bottom enjoy this particular type of bondage? (This helps me get in their head.)
- What does the bottom want to get out of the experience?
- What about the top—what are they hoping to get out of it?
- Is this clothed, semi-nude, or nude?
- Is there any other activity expected in the scene? (This may kick off its own checklist.)
- Some bondage types may leave marks—is that okay?
- How will the bottom communicate if they need to use a safe word, especially if there’s a hood, gag, or other restraint involved?
- What type of aftercare are both parties expecting?
Assessment
- Does the bottom have any physical limitations (e.g., joint issues, muscle strains)?
- Has either the top or bottom been drinking or taking drugs (including prescriptions)?
- Are there any material allergies (e.g., latex)?
- What’s the bottom’s circulatory health like?
- Does the bottom have any mental health considerations or potential triggers (e.g., claustrophobia)?
- Are both parties hydrated, rested, and nourished?
- Does the bottom have plans later that might be impacted by a heavy bondage scene?
Safety
- Check equipment: Are clips, swivels, and cuffs working as expected?
- Are the correct cuff keys labeled and accessible?
- Is there a cutting tool available in case you need to cut leather, rope, saran wrap, or latex?
- Is the room temperature comfortable for both parties?
- During the scene: Monitor respiration, check extremities for circulation and temperature, and know how to handle issues like cramps (e.g., a charley horse).
- After the scene: Provide the requested aftercare, and check on flexibility and mobility.
- Debrief: Debriefs are always helpful for both the top and bottom. How’s everyone feeling? What went well? What could be improved next time?
Good kinksters practicing good kink love to communicate! It might not seem sexy in the moment, but being prepared and doing the work upfront allows you to fully immerse yourself in the scene. That’s when the magic happens, and you can have a super groovy time.