Wow. What a class. And by class I mean a clear lecture on what these types of play are in terms of definition, safety considerations, and a really amazing demo.
I first and foremost want to thank KinkEdAtlanta for hosting important educational events like this one. I was happy to see a healthy-sized crowd in attendance. The presenters were amazing and we could not have been in better hands for this experience. Thanks to both for their generosity.
I’ll start by saying that this is not really a kink of mine. I like to put my hands up under someone’s throat (not in a strangulation grip – more to expose the neck to my teeth) and if the moment seems right I’ll put my hand over nose and mouth. But doing blood chokes (which was covered in this class) is not really my jam, and I’ve never done suffocation breath play beyond a few seconds of hand on face.
So why did I go to this class?
I want to be able to speak with some knowledge should it come up in conversation. I’ve never done any kind of martial arts/athletic training where cutting off the carotid artery might be a thing. It kind of scares the shit out of me and while it scares me a lot less now I have a very healthy respect for the risks. As for suffocation I had a bit more curiosity about it because I am so into bondage and objectification that the idea of adding in some more intense breath play intrigues me.
To be very clear: Manual airway strangulation is not a thing you should be doing. That is putting your hands (or a rope, belt, etc.) around someone’s throat and cutting off the airway. You can crush the trachea with way less pressure than you think you need. You will probably do permanent damage that a person *might* live through before they pass out. Just. Don’t. Do. It. and I don’t give a shit how experienced of a top you are. I’m not going to argue with anyone on this.
Back to the class.
Choking for this workshop was specifically a blood choke, described on Wikipedia as “Blood chokes (or carotid restraints / sleeper holds) are a form of strangulation that compress one or both carotid arteries and/or the jugular veins without compressing the airway, hence causing cerebral ischemia and a temporary hypoxic condition in the brain.” The receiver basically does the rag doll drop. You need to know your anatomy, you need to be paying attention for when the bottom is dropping, and you need to plan for how you’re going to catch them. Very rarely do we experience the heft of basically dead body weight so as an aside I would recommend having someone go completely dead limp while you’re holding them so you can experience that before they are actually out.
Very little pressure or time is needed – it’s more finding the right place and applying the pressure as equally as possible. You can do a quick read of the anatomy of this system at this helpful UMass Med School link. You can also Google “anatomy of the neck” and get all kinds of pretty pictures. There is no excuse for not taking 5 minutes and getting a basic understanding of this anatomy. Generally a 3-5 second application of pressure on the arteries does the trick. You should release as soon as you feel the bottom go under.
Repeat application of this pressure can have a cumulative effect. As in any other BDSM scenario you want to check to make sure you get all pertinent medical information from your bottom. Someone who is on blood thinners or who has uncontrolled blood pressure or has a history of transient ischemic attacks (TIA), etc. is probably not going to be someone you want to do this with.
Plan your positions. If you are standing behind the bottom make sure that you are going to be able to support that sudden dead weight. If they are sitting make sure they can safely slump to the side. You also want to always make sure you are not putting pressure on the trachea. If you do a rear naked choke – arm from behind around the neck – the trachea should get tucked into the fold of your elbow. Ideally you should quickly be able to get that bottom into a prone position on their back with their legs elevated if they take more than a few seconds to revive.
Trigger warning: Suffocation
Suffocation for this class was defined as impairing the airway through manual blocking or limiting or completely impeding the action of the diaphragm and lungs. So you can put a bag over someone’s head, or a hand over their mouth and nose, or put them in a tight corset and then sit on them. You can consider crucifixion as positional suffocation. With a bag over your head your diaphragm will still work but the lungs cannot fill with any air because there is none. Same with a hand over mouth and nose. If you put someone in a tight corset (and/or sit on them) it impedes the action of the diaphragm so while their airway is not restricted, the mechanism of how the air comes in is and you are literally unable to take a breath. Snakes were mentioned and yes – constrictors kill their prey by basically constricting the mechanism of the diaphragm. As the prey breathes out the snake constricts the coils more and soon there is no room for the diaphragm to expand and pull air into the lungs. The prey suffocates.
In the blood choke all systems are operational – the person will continue to breathe and oxygenate. In suffocation a very key system is rendered inoperable and the body DOES NOT LIKE THAT. This is probably why you see more suffocation with bondage – it minimizes risk for the top and for the bottom as the fight/flight mode kicks in.
We have all held our breath to see if we could make ourselves pass out, right? I like to be at a point in my respiratory health that I can swim a vigorous 75m without taking a breath and hopefully I’ll get up to 150m this year. Free divers are able to not take a breath for an average of 9 minutes. That is a VERY VERY long time but those folks are highly conditioned athletes who have the mind-blowing capability of hyper-oxygenating their blood before a dive. The majority of humans can go without oxygen no longer than 4 minutes, at which point PERMANENT BRAIN DAMAGE starts to occur.
The demo bottom shared that the overwhelming drive of trying to find an air pocket – more room to breathe within the plastic – was overwhelming. With her hands bound she couldn’t pull the bag away herself. She leaned forward looking for air. Had our presenter not pulled open the bag around her mouth she would have undoubtedly thrown her body hard enough to fall over, still attached to the chair. If you’ve ever watched a scene in a movie where someone is murdered this way – suffocation while bound – you’ve probably seen a pretty realistic reenactment. It’s kind of terrifying.
If someone stops breathing you need to get going with your mouth-to-mouth skills and you need to be prepared to call 911. This is no joke.
- Responsible tops do not break their toys.
- What you see in super edge BDSM porn is not real in that there is a whole safety team off-camera standing by.
- The best scenes of this kind are highly detailed in their planning and set up.
- Don’t do manual airway strangulation of the throat.
- Given how much the body hates it when it can’t get air you don’t have to go as far as this demo to get a reaction if that’s your yum.
- Start slow, learn anatomy, know what to do in an emergency.
- Be prepared. Be prepared. Be prepared.
We were time-constrained at the class location or I’m sure we would have been there for at least another hour for questions and discussion.